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Two and a Half Men

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S12 E16 · Of Course He's Dead (2)

About Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men is a comedy TV series that premiered on CBS on September 22, 2003. It has 12 seasons and 262 episodes so far and has ended. The latest episode, Season 12 Episode 16 "Of Course He's Dead (2)", aired on February 19, 2015.

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.

  • Comedy

Last updated

Episodes

262 episodes · 12 seasons

Season 1

2003 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 22 years ago

Bachelor Charlie Harper’s carefree life is turned upside down when his uptight brother Alan and nephew Jake move in, sparking chaos and comedy in Malibu.

Two and a Half Men Season 1 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S1 E24 still E24

    24. Can You Feel My Finger?

    Finale

    Charlie has a pregnancy scare involving one of his one-night stands and decides to go for the big "V," and we're not talking Vegas.

  2. Two and a Half Men S1 E23 still E23

    23. Just Like Buffalo

    When Jake repeats one of Charlie's sexist remarks in front of Judith's support group, the women convince Judith to stop Jake's visits with his dad and Charlie.

  3. Two and a Half Men S1 E22 still E22

    22. My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet

    When Charlie discovers that Alan is sleepwalking, he believes it's related to his brother's lack of sex following his divorce, and comes up with a cure.

  4. Two and a Half Men S1 E21 still E21

    21. No Sniffing, No Wowing

    Charlie plays a tricky game when he gets involved with Alan's divorce lawyer, who could make things difficult for Alan if she were, say, dumped by a self-centered lothario.

  5. Two and a Half Men S1 E20 still E20

    20. Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

    Jake's sullen mood baffles and bothers the family and prompts Alan and Judith to take him to a child psychologist.

  6. Two and a Half Men S1 E19 still E19

    19. I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

    Judith's devious siren sister stirs things up at Jake's 11th birthday party when she hits on Alan. Meanwhile, Evelyn brings alcohol and has a party of her own.

  7. Two and a Half Men S1 E18 still E18

    18. An Old Flame With a New Wick

    Charlie is stunned to learn his ex-girlfriend is now a man.

  8. Two and a Half Men S1 E17 still E17

    17. Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats

    Charlie's still brooding over Alan's choice of their cousin as Jake's guardian if both parents die when the boy has an accident while in his care and has to be rushed to the hospital.

  9. Two and a Half Men S1 E16 still E16

    16. That Was Saliva, Alan

    Charlie is perplexed when Frankie, the mysterious woman temporarily living in the Harper household, begins falling for Alan and not him.

  10. Two and a Half Men S1 E15 still E15

    15. Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick

    Charlie invites a mysterious, slightly crazed woman to stay at the house until she can settle some family problems.

  11. Two and a Half Men S1 E14 still E14

    14. I Can't Afford Hyenas

    Charlie's financial manager informs the carefree jingle writer that he spends money faster than his royalty checks come in, and now he must go on a budget.

  12. Two and a Half Men S1 E13 still E13

    13. Sarah Like Puny Alan

    Charlie nurses an ailing Alan back to health so they can go on a double date with two sisters, one of whom Charlie's been wanting to date for a long time.

  13. Two and a Half Men S1 E12 still E12

    12. Camel Filters and Pheromones

    Berta's granddaughter spends the day at Charlie's, which isn't a problem until he learns she's a beautiful, rebellious 16-year-old.

  14. Two and a Half Men S1 E11 still E11

    11. Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

    Mid-season finale

    When Alan is surprised to see that Judith has had a makeover and is dating a man, he decides to have Charlie help him transform his image.

  15. Two and a Half Men S1 E10 still E10

    10. Merry Thanksgiving

    Realizing he's losing someone special, Charlie plans a Thanksgiving dinner to convince her he's a family guy and that she should be with him.

  16. Two and a Half Men S1 E9 still E9

    9. Phase One, Complete

    Charlie is convinced that a woman who spent the night with him wants to turn their relationship into something serious after she befriends Jake and Evelyn.

  17. Two and a Half Men S1 E8 still E8

    8. Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful

    Alan tricks Charlie into joining him and Judith in leading Jake and his classmates in the school's annual music show.

  18. Two and a Half Men S1 E7 still E7

    7. If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

    Judith is upset with Alan and Charlie when she learns that a surfer who uses Charlie's shower walks around half naked in front of Jake . Then Alan's worried when Judith and the surfer become friends.

  19. Two and a Half Men S1 E6 still E6

    6. Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

    The guys go to Evelyn's house to meet the new man she's dating, and Charlie realizes the man's daughter is a woman he's trying to avoid.

  20. Two and a Half Men S1 E5 still E5

    5. The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump

    Alan and Charlie have encounters with some highly libidinous soccer moms, but with two very different outcomes.

  21. Two and a Half Men S1 E4 still E4

    4. If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap

    Charlie can't function when his housekeeper storms off because of Alan's constant complaints, so Alan tries desperately to woo her back. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie for dating advice.

  22. Two and a Half Men S1 E3 still E3

    3. Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

    Jake wants to go home to his mom after he gets sick, prompting Alan to think he's a failure as a husband and now as a father.

  23. Two and a Half Men S1 E2 still E2

    2. Big Flappy Bastards

    Despite warnings from Charlie, Jake continues to feed seagulls on the deck and the birds invade the house. Meanwhile, Charlie thinks Judith is taking advantage of Alan, who keeps going to her house to fix things.

  24. Two and a Half Men S1 E1 still E1

    1. Pilot

    Carefree jingle writer Charlie Harper has his lifestyle altered when his uptight brother and his 10-year-old nephew move in with him.

Season 2

2004 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 21 years ago

Charlie adjusts (badly) to life with family underfoot, while Alan struggles with single fatherhood and dating again, and Jake grows into a lovable troublemaker.

Two and a Half Men Season 2 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S2 E24 still E24

    24. Does This Smell Funny to You?

    Finale

    Charlie unknowingly sleeps with an older man's trophy wife while Jake has to read a paper to his class.

  2. Two and a Half Men S2 E23 still E23

    23. Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab

    Evelyn demands Jake spend a night at her place when she finds out he spent Spring Break with Judith's parents. Neither Alan nor Charlie are keen on the idea, but going to a bar after dropping off Jake quickly erases their concerns.

  3. Two and a Half Men S2 E22 still E22

    22. That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother

    Evelyn buys Alan a new Sports car causing Charlie to claim that his brother has sold his soul to the Devil. The next day, Evelyn extracts payment by insisting that Alan go on a blind, double date with her, her new beau and his daughter. At the restaurant, Alan learns that his mother and boyfriend will not be able to join them because there was a mixup between his heart medication and Viagra and she didn't want to ""waste it"". As a result, Alan is left to deal with the daughter, who is on a weekend pass from a rehab center and still has some loose screws. Alan eventually gets her back to the beach house only to have her drive off in his new sports car and become the object of a televised high-speed car chase.

  4. Two and a Half Men S2 E21 still E21

    21. A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On

    Evelyn reads in the obituaries that her second husband, Harry has died. They all attend the funeral, including Jake who is excited at the opportunity of seeing a ""dead guy"". Charlie is excited by the opportunity of a newly single widow, and Alan is just happy to pay his respects to Harry.

  5. Two and a Half Men S2 E20 still E20

    20. I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey

    Rose tries to help the brothers sort out their feelings, when Charlie and Alan take their personal frustrations out on each other.

  6. Two and a Half Men S2 E19 still E19

    19. A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise

    After Charlie takes Alan to an eye doctor, they end up at cafe where they bump into Charlie's ex-girlfriend, Sherri. While there Alan shows an interest in Sherri, and decides to ask her out. The problem is that Alan can't get over Sherri's relationship with Charlie.

  7. Two and a Half Men S2 E18 still E18

    18. It Was 'Mame', Mom

    Charlie is invited to a party hosted by a gay ad-executive named Eric, so Charlie asks Alan to pretend that he's his life partner. While at the party, Charlie meets Eric's ex-wife Pamela, and tries to sleep with her without Eric finding out.

  8. Two and a Half Men S2 E17 still E17

    17. Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!

    After Charlie has back pain, Alan decides to take him to the Hospital. While there Charlie can't stop hitting on the doctor who is examining him. The only problem is that he has a history with her that he can't remember. Berta is feed up with Jake's inability to use the bathroom properly, so she decides to make him clean it until he learns.

  9. Two and a Half Men S2 E16 still E16

    16. Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?

    When Judith decides to take a vacation, the brothers have to take care of Jake during the week. Alan finds it challenging, and even forgets to pick up Jake from soccer practice. When Alan finds out that he has to go to the I.R.S. because they're auditing him, he forces Charlie to take care of Jake, and Charlie doesn't do any better then Alan.

  10. Two and a Half Men S2 E15 still E15

    15. Smell the Umbrella Stand

    Alan starts to worry about a medical procedure that he is facing, and to get his mind off it, Charlie suggests they go to Las Vegas.

  11. Two and a Half Men S2 E14 still E14

    14. Those Big Pink Things with Coconut

    The brothers throw out their mother, after she insults the way Alan is raising Jake. When Alan and Charlie ignore her phone calls, to get their attention she ends up in the hospital. When Alan and Charlie show up at the hospital they aren't sure if she's faking, and try to call her bluff.

  12. Two and a Half Men S2 E13 still E13

    13. Zejdz z Zmoich Wlosów (Get Off My Hair)

    After an earthquake hits, Judith's house is damaged and she needs a place to stay. So Alan decides to invite her to stay with him and Charlie, without getting Charlie's permission. Charlie isn't happy with this, but accepts it. Alan becomes jealous when Judith goes on a date, and asks Charlie to find him a date, so that he can show Judith that he dates as well.

  13. Two and a Half Men S2 E12 still E12

    12. A Lungful of Alan

    Alan is jealous of Charlie when an old classmate, who's now a beautiful woman, seems to be more interested in Charlie.

  14. Two and a Half Men S2 E11 still E11

    11. Last Chance to See Those Tattoos

    Mid-season finale

    After getting unusually turned down at a bar, Charlie learns that a website has been made dedicated to exposing his lifestyle. Charlie sets out to find who created the site, making amends to all those he stood up, but it's harder than it looks when all the women take the apology better than expected.

  15. Two and a Half Men S2 E10 still E10

    10. The Salmon Under My Sweater

    Charlie tries to get Jake's approval on a theme song that he is hired to write for a television show, which is based on a comic book that Jake is a fan. While Alan finds out more about Rose (including how smart she is), when he spends more time with her.

  16. Two and a Half Men S2 E9 still E9

    9. Yes, Monsignor

    When Charlie leaves the house to avoid a date that he can't stand, he ends up at a coffee shop, where he meets his old girlfriend Lisa. He finds out that she broke up with her husband, and now has a child. Now he must try to convince Lisa that he's okay with her having a child. While Jake tries to justify to his father why he isn't doing so well in school.

  17. Two and a Half Men S2 E8 still E8

    8. Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers

    Alan meets a woman named Nancy at a grocery store, who fulfills every single one of his desires, forcing Charlie to take care of Jake. After knowing Nancy for a few days Alan decides to ask her to marry him, prompting Charlie to try and talk him out of it, and he even gets help from the brothers' mother.

  18. Two and a Half Men S2 E7 still E7

    7. A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana

    Charlie and Alan hire Berta's sister to cater a party their mother has conned them into throwing for her.

  19. Two and a Half Men S2 E6 still E6

    6. The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance

    Alan denies having shoplifted a toy as a child and fears he has a dark side, until Charlie admits he planted the toy on Alan to stay out of trouble himself.

  20. Two and a Half Men S2 E5 still E5

    5. Bad News from the Clinic?

    Charlie meets his match when he falls for a woman who's better at playing hard to get than he is.

  21. Two and a Half Men S2 E4 still E4

    4. Go Get Mommy's Bra

    Jake is very impressed and can't stop talking about his mother's new boyfriend, Dr. Melnick, which annoys Alan. While Evelyn borrows Charlie's car to help her impress a Saudi prince, because she wants to sell him real estate. When Charlie gets his car back, he discovers his mother's bra in the backseat. When he finds out why it's there he decides to trade in his car.

  22. Two and a Half Men S2 E3 still E3

    3. A Bag Full of Jawea

    Charlie tries to save Jake from school suspension for giving his teacher (Missi Pyle) the finger by romancing her, but his several attempts fail every time.

  23. Two and a Half Men S2 E2 still E2

    2. Enjoy Those Garlic Balls

    Judith is dating Jake's pediatrician, and Alan is upset until Charlie points out that if she remarries, his alimony payments will end.

  24. Two and a Half Men S2 E1 still E1

    1. Back Off, Mary Poppins

    Alan learns that Charlie belongs to an exclusive men's group, and he begs his brother to let him join.

Season 3

2005 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 20 years ago

Family ties tighten and tension rises as Charlie's wild ways clash with Alan's neuroses, leading to hilarious misadventures in love, work, and parenting.

Two and a Half Men Season 3 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S3 E24 still E24

    24. That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite

    Finale

    Charlie and Mia start making their wedding arrangements. Things begin to fall apart when their two families meet each other. They eventually decide on a small ceremony in Las Vegas.

  2. Two and a Half Men S3 E23 still E23

    23. Arguments for the Quickie

    Mia comes back to town with her dance troupe and invites Charlie to her performance. At first, he decides not to go and tries to convince Alan that he no longer has feelings for her. He goes to the see the performance and Mia explains that she wants some of Charlie's sperm. Charlie responds by asking Mia for something.

  3. Two and a Half Men S3 E22 still E22

    22. Just Once with Aunt Sophie

    A girl from Jake's school invites him to his first boy-girl party. Charlie and Alan help him get ready for it by giving him advice. Alan and Charlie get nostalgic and remember their first boy-girl party.

  4. Two and a Half Men S3 E21 still E21

    21. And the Plot Moistens

    Jake's teacher has a meeting with Alan and Judith to discuss the lack of interest Jake has at school. Alan starts to fall for Francine, in a platonic way, because he is tired of the lack of intelligent communication he has with Kandi. Charlie helps Jake audition for his school musical.

  5. Two and a Half Men S3 E20 still E20

    20. Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

    Alan tries to win Kandi back. Meanwhile, Charlie starts to sleep with her mom, Mandi, and Judith gets set up with her father, Andy.

  6. Two and a Half Men S3 E19 still E19

    19. Golly Moses, She's a Muffin

    Charlie is surprised to find out that Kandi has been living with them for the last three weeks. Alan is having a tough time helping Kandi earn a living. Charlie has lost his sense because of the dry-spell he is going through.

  7. Two and a Half Men S3 E18 still E18

    18. The Spit-Covered Cobbler

    Alan starts to have financial problems when he starts paying for his girlfriend's bills, so Charlie tries to get him to break up with her. Meanwhile, Judith is after Alan because he is late in paying his alimony check.

  8. Two and a Half Men S3 E17 still E17

    17. The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer

    Charlie is nominated for an advertising award, but he decides to boycott it because his arch nemesis always wins. The rest of his family tries to trick him into going. Rose is having relationship problems with Gordon and seeks help from Charlie.

  9. Two and a Half Men S3 E16 still E16

    16. Ergo, the Booty Call

    Alan has trouble deciding if he should bring his younger girlfriend to Jake's birthday party to meet his mom and his ex-wife. Rose tries to get her boyfriend to act more like Charlie.

  10. Two and a Half Men S3 E15 still E15

    15. My Tongue Is Meat

    Charlie has trouble keeping up with Mia's healthy lifestyle, so he begins to sneak beers, cigars, and burgers behind her back. When Mia finds out what he was doing, Charlie has to decide if he is truly in love with her or just whipped.

  11. Two and a Half Men S3 E14 still E14

    14. Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded

    Charlie arranges a romantic date with Mia in the hopes of consummating their relationship. Alan begins to date Charlie's most recent ex-girlfriend.

  12. Two and a Half Men S3 E13 still E13

    13. Humiliation Is a Visual Medium

    Charlie finds himself in a relationship that is not based on sex.

  13. Two and a Half Men S3 E12 still E12

    12. That Special Tug

    Charlie sees a therapist to learn how to deal with Alan's emotional insecurities.

  14. Two and a Half Men S3 E11 still E11

    11. Santa's Village of the Damned

    Mid-season finale

    Alan starts dating a woman with a Martha Stewart complex. Before long she's running the house with an obsession for perfection.

  15. Two and a Half Men S3 E10 still E10

    10. Something Salted and Twisted

    Charlie helps Alan with his obsession of always having to get approval from the women in his life.

  16. Two and a Half Men S3 E9 still E9

    9. Madame and Her Special Friend

    One of Charlie's elderly neighbors tries to seduce Alan, while Charlie tries to stop Jake from giving money to a televangelist.

  17. Two and a Half Men S3 E8 still E8

    8. That Voodoo That I Do Do

    Charlie tricks Jake into taking ballet lessons, so he can get close to the teacher.

  18. Two and a Half Men S3 E7 still E7

    7. Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop

    Charlie wakes up with Rose the morning after her birthday party. Her irate father comes to ask Charlie about what the future holds for him and Rose, but the unexpected happens when Evelyn shows up.

  19. Two and a Half Men S3 E6 still E6

    6. Hi, Mr. Horned One

    Ignoring Alan's warnings, Charlie continues to date Isabella until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.

  20. Two and a Half Men S3 E5 still E5

    5. We Called It Mr. Pinky

    Charlie learns he can't be in a long-lasting relationship, becuase of unresolved issues he has with his mother. Jake asks Charlie for advice about a girl at school.

  21. Two and a Half Men S3 E4 still E4

    4. Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs

    Berta causes tension between Charlie and Alan, when she temporarily moves in with them

  22. Two and a Half Men S3 E3 still E3

    3. Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark

    Alan has been dating a lot, and Charlie soon finds out that it has been one woman - his ex-wife, Judith. He tries to stop Alan, and even brings Rose, Evelyn and Berta to interfere - but Alan ignores them all.

  23. Two and a Half Men S3 E2 still E2

    2. Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

    Jake gets suspended from school after drawing an offensive picture of a girl in his class that has large breasts. Meanwhile, Charlie is asked to watch over Alan's chiropractic office after pulling an all-nighter.

  24. Two and a Half Men S3 E1 still E1

    1. Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts

    After falling off the roof, Alan needs Charlie's help in looking after Jake, which interferes with Charlie's social life.

Season 4

2006 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 19 years ago

Change is in the air as Charlie's bachelor lifestyle meets new romantic twists, while Alan deals with ex‑wife drama and Jake continues to steal every scene.

Two and a Half Men Season 4 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S4 E24 still E24

    24. Prostitutes and Gelato

    Finale

    Evelyn's boyfriend, Teddy, invites Alan and Charlie to go with him to Las Vegas on his private jet. The boys confront their individual 'daddy issues'

  2. Two and a Half Men S4 E23 still E23

    23. Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin'

    Charlie is shocked when the handyman working on his house beats him out for Chloe's affections. Alan has no sympathy for Charlie's distress.

  3. Two and a Half Men S4 E22 still E22

    22. Mr. McGlue's Feedbag

    Jake gets lucky after Charlie takes him to the racetrack. Meanwhile, Alan has a difficult time at the DMV.

  4. Two and a Half Men S4 E21 still E21

    21. Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous

    Alan and Charlie re-examine their sexual identities after Alan befriends Greg, a gay man. Meanwhile, Jake has a crush on Greg's daughter.

  5. Two and a Half Men S4 E20 still E20

    20. Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot

    Alan looks forward to Judith's wedding, while Charlie and Myra continue their romance.

  6. Two and a Half Men S4 E19 still E19

    19. Smooth as a Ken Doll

    Charlie takes a liking to Myra, the witty sister of Judith's fiancé, Herb.

  7. Two and a Half Men S4 E18 still E18

    18. It Never Rains in Hooterville

    Alan tries to bond with Jake when he realizes that his childhood is almost over. Kandi pursues a career in acting.

  8. Two and a Half Men S4 E17 still E17

    17. I Merely Slept with a Commie

    After Evelyn tells Alan and Charlie how she feels about there being no mourners at her friend's funeral, the boys share their feelings that this could also be the case at her funeral. Evelyn tries to prove them wrong by introducing them to a couple she help adopt a boy from China. The boys return fire by inviting the young man to a play date with Jake.

  9. Two and a Half Men S4 E16 still E16

    16. Young People Have Phlegm Too

    Charlie's young, hot girlfriend takes him to a new club. She invites Alan to meet one of her friends but the men are shocked to learn that they are considered as being "old".

  10. Two and a Half Men S4 E15 still E15

    15. My Damn Stalker

    Rose is moving to London, and Charlie is surprised by his reaction to the news. Alan lies to a woman he met online.

  11. Two and a Half Men S4 E14 still E14

    14. That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami

    Charlie sets Alan up with their new neighbour. But he gets jealous when the two form a bond.

  12. Two and a Half Men S4 E13 still E13

    13. Don't Worry, Speed Racer

    Jake shares that he has heard his mother having sex with her fiancée, Herb; this revelation brings up a repressed memory for Charlie. This leads Charlie to seek help from Rose.

  13. Two and a Half Men S4 E12 still E12

    12. Castrating Sheep in Montana

    Berta discovers that Alan has been dating her daughter Naomi.

  14. Two and a Half Men S4 E11 still E11

    11. Walnuts and Demerol

    Mid-season finale

    Charlie's friends and family put a crimp in his plan for a romantic Christmas Eve date. When Evelyn sees who the date is, she goes to great lengths to force a wedge between them.

  15. Two and a Half Men S4 E10 still E10

    10. Kissing Abe Lincoln

    Worrying Charlie may get rid of one of them, Berta and Lydia fight over him. Meanwhile, Kandi does everything she can to stop Alan from selling their condo.

  16. Two and a Half Men S4 E9 still E9

    9. Corey's Been Dead for an Hour

    Charlie gets tired of Alan's mooching and reaches the breaking point during the brothers' double date. Jake is left home alone for the first time.

  17. Two and a Half Men S4 E8 still E8

    8. Release the Dogs

    Alan suffers from insomnia. He visits his psychiatrist, who reveals that the cause of Alan's sleepless nights is his jealousy towards Charlie, and his inability to glide through life.

  18. Two and a Half Men S4 E7 still E7

    7. Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head

    Berta's daughter, Naomi is pregnant and Berta drags Charlie with her when she confronts the baby's father. Alan reveals a secret fetish.

  19. Two and a Half Men S4 E6 still E6

    6. Apologies for the Frivolity

    Charlie is dating a woman whose personality and life are like his mother's.

  20. Two and a Half Men S4 E5 still E5

    5. A Live Woman of Proven Fertility

    Alan is overjoyed by the prospect of Judith remarrying, as he would no longer have to pay alimony. Alan gets Charlie to help him when it looks like the marriage maybe derailed due to Jake's dislike of his mother's fiancé.

  21. Two and a Half Men S4 E4 still E4

    4. A Pot-Smokin' Monkey

    Alan tries to hire his ex-wife's lawyer to help him win custody over the dog he and Kandi shared.

  22. Two and a Half Men S4 E3 still E3

    3. The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress

    Charlie tries to surf to impress Dottie, a beautiful woman he just met, but after he nearly drowns he is convinced that he saw his late father.

  23. Two and a Half Men S4 E2 still E2

    2. Who Is This Vod Kanockers?

    Charlie finally tells Alan that he didn't marry Mia because she wanted Alan and Jake to move out of the house, but Alan finds a hole in his logic. Charlie and Alan deal with a noisy neighbor who constantly sings all the time, who happens to be Steven Tyler.

  24. Two and a Half Men S4 E1 still E1

    1. Working for Caligula

    Charlie returns to his bachelor lifestyle after Alan moves out of the house. Alan suffers a breakdown after his divorce from Kandi.

Season 5

2007 · 19 episodes · Last episode: 18 years ago

Charlie finds himself in unfamiliar territory with real feelings, Alan keeps stumbling through relationships, and Jake edges from boyhood into teenage antics.

Two and a Half Men Season 5 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S5 E19 still E19

    19. Waiting for the Right Snapper

    Finale

    When Charlie meets Angie's soon to be daughter-in-law, he realizes it's not for the first time.

  2. Two and a Half Men S5 E18 still E18

    18. If My Hole Could Talk

    Charlie's attracted to an older self-help author. Alan and Jake clash over a project for school.

  3. Two and a Half Men S5 E17 still E17

    17. Fish in a Drawer

    CSIs investigate a death at Charlie's house.

  4. Two and a Half Men S5 E16 still E16

    16. Look at Me Mommy, I'm Pretty

    Alan makes wedding plans for Evelyn and Teddy, while Charlie figures out how to get more acquainted with his future step-sister.

  5. Two and a Half Men S5 E15 still E15

    15. Rough Night in Hump Junction

    Alan feels Charlie is unable to control his womanizing ways.

  6. Two and a Half Men S5 E14 still E14

    14. Winky-Dink Time

    Charlie double-dates with Jake and fixes Alan up with a hooker.

  7. Two and a Half Men S5 E13 still E13

    13. The Soil Is Moist

    Alan finds out some surprising information about Judith's sex life when he decides to go on a date with one of her friends.

  8. Two and a Half Men S5 E12 still E12

    12. A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh

    Rose returns from England, and plays nurse rather oddly for an ill Charlie.

  9. Two and a Half Men S5 E11 still E11

    11. Meander to Your Dander

    When Alan finds himself wanting to break up with a woman, Charlie offers his expertise.

  10. Two and a Half Men S5 E10 still E10

    10. Kinda Like Necrophilia

    Mid-season finale

    Alan finds out that Charlie stole his girlfriend and works on a plan to get back at Charlie, even though this happened when they were in high school.

  11. Two and a Half Men S5 E9 still E9

    9. Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids

    Charlie fights his attraction for Teddy's daughter.

  12. Two and a Half Men S5 E8 still E8

    8. Is There a Mrs. Waffles?

    Charlie writes a children's song and finds success as Charlie Waffles. The children love him and the mothers seem to as well. Charlie's new found fame irritates Alan.

  13. Two and a Half Men S5 E7 still E7

    7. The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room

    After Alan and Charlie have a fight about Alan's role in the house. Alan packs Jake up and moves in with his mother.

  14. Two and a Half Men S5 E6 still E6

    6. Help Daddy Find His Toenail

    Charlie's girlfriend is embrassed to go out in public with him. Meanwhile, Jake sneaks out to attend a concert.

  15. Two and a Half Men S5 E5 still E5

    5. Putting Swim Fins on a Cat

    Charlie has to come up with ways to keep his girlfriend's 4-year-old amused; Alan becomes a test subject.

  16. Two and a Half Men S5 E4 still E4

    4. City of Great Racks

    Charlie and Linda get closer to consummating their relationship, but Charlie has trouble focusing when he begins to see Rose's face everywhere he turns.

  17. Two and a Half Men S5 E3 still E3

    3. Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo

    Alan convinces Charlie that he needs to date more respectable women and sets him up with a judge. The two double date and their waitress happens to be one of Charlie's ex-girlfriends. Charlie's date backfires the following morning, when he ends up in court in front of the judge.

  18. Two and a Half Men S5 E2 still E2

    2. Media Room Slash Dungeon

    Charlie acts strange after spending an evening with his mother, and a woman Alan slept with behaves oddly the next morning.

  19. Two and a Half Men S5 E1 still E1

    1. Large Birds, Spiders and Mom

    Jake is getting ready to start a new school as he graduates to Junior High. Alan and Charlie take him school shopping and find themselves in trouble.

Season 6

2008 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 17 years ago

The house feels smaller than ever as everyone's bad habits collide — love, money, and family chaos run rampant in Malibu.

Two and a Half Men Season 6 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S6 E24 still E24

    24. Baseball Was Better with Steroids

    Finale

    Charlie starts to question his relationship with Chelsea when he hears that Mia is back in town. Meanwhile, Judith goes into labor and Charlie, Alan and Herb rush her to the hospital, on the sixth season finale.

  2. Two and a Half Men S6 E23 still E23

    23. Good Morning Mrs. Butterworth

    Alan and Chelsea become best buds, and Charlie decides to take advantage of the situation.

  3. Two and a Half Men S6 E22 still E22

    22. Sir Lancelot's Litter Box

    Charlie mourns the loss of his bachelor pad as he reluctantly allows Chelsea to move in. Meanwhile, Alan discovers there is no longer much space left in the house for him.

  4. Two and a Half Men S6 E21 still E21

    21. Above Exalted Cyclops

    Chelsea is asked by Alan to arrange a blind date between he and her new friend, unaware that her new friend is Rose.

  5. Two and a Half Men S6 E20 still E20

    20. Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau

    Charlie's desperate to make sure Chelsea and Evelyn don't befriend each other following their first meeting.

  6. Two and a Half Men S6 E19 still E19

    19. The Two Finger Rule

    After Chelsea discovers a nude picture of another woman on Charlie's cell phone, he blows off steam by going out for a night of drinking with Alan, Herb and his neighbor.

  7. Two and a Half Men S6 E18 still E18

    18. My Son's Enormous Head

    Chelsea's illness gives Charlie a chance to prove he can take care of her, but also yearning to run away from the situation.

  8. Two and a Half Men S6 E17 still E17

    17. The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?

    Charlie's admission that he's in love with Chelsea gets a surprising reaction from her

  9. Two and a Half Men S6 E16 still E16

    16. She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime

    Charlie has to remove a half-naked woman from his bedroom before Chelsea arrives.

  10. Two and a Half Men S6 E15 still E15

    15. I'd Like to Start with the Cat

    Charlie ends up in couples counseling.

  11. Two and a Half Men S6 E14 still E14

    14. David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie

    Melissa doesn't think Alan's family appreciates him, so she asks him to move in with her and her mom.

  12. Two and a Half Men S6 E13 still E13

    13. I Think You Offended Don

    Judith is pregnant with a baby girl and Alan is convinced he is the father.

  13. Two and a Half Men S6 E12 still E12

    12. Thank God for Scoliosis

    Charlie and Jake fight for the affections of a waitress, while Alan fights sexual tension with his receptionist.

  14. Two and a Half Men S6 E11 still E11

    11. The Devil's Lube

    Mid-season finale

    Charlie finds himself re-examining his wild ways when an old friend dies and begins to feel that his time on Earth may be drawing to a close.

  15. Two and a Half Men S6 E10 still E10

    10. He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited

    Evelyn offers to pay for Jake's college education, and Alan becomes listless because he has no compelling reason to work anymore, while Jake discovers a hidden talent in the culinary arts that may allow him to bypass college altogether.

  16. Two and a Half Men S6 E9 still E9

    9. The Mooch at the Boo

    Charlie finds himself in an uncomfortable position when Jake takes off with the daughter of a former NFL player. Charlie's Mercedes proves a boon to Alan's love life.

  17. Two and a Half Men S6 E8 still E8

    8. Pinocchio's Mouth

    Charlie's new girlfriend Chelsea asks him to spend the night at her place, which puts Charlie well outside of his comfort zone, while Alan tries to enforce a punishment on Jake initiated by Judith for mooning a group of girls.

  18. Two and a Half Men S6 E7 still E7

    7. Best H.O. Money Can Buy

    Alan tries to escape Judith's grasp as Charlie and Herb go on the prowl to pick up women. They later end up going back to Herb's hotel room with two prostitutes, where Herb declares his love for Judith and races over to win her back.

  19. Two and a Half Men S6 E6 still E6

    6. It's Always Nazi Week

    When Judith kicks Herb to the curb, Alan comes knocking; Jake is sent to stay with a less-than-willing Charlie for three months during Judith's meltdown.

  20. Two and a Half Men S6 E5 still E5

    5. A Jock Strap in Hell

    Charlie tries to help Jake's former teacher, who became a stripper after dating him, but things go from bad to worse when she has a religious conversion.

  21. Two and a Half Men S6 E4 still E4

    4. The Flavin' and the Mavin'

    Alan is sure that things will turn bad when Charlie starts dating his receptionist.

  22. Two and a Half Men S6 E3 still E3

    3. Damn You, Eggs Benedict

    Alan, Jake, and Charlie all decide to try new things: Alan is dating more than one woman, Charlie learns to cook, and Jake experiments with beer.

  23. Two and a Half Men S6 E2 still E2

    2. Pie Hole, Herb

    Charlie borrowed money from Alan and on the day he is supposed to pay him back, Alan goes to ask Charlie for the money. He again finds Charlie in bed with a beautiful woman. After Charlie shoos him out and assures him he'll get the money for him later that day, the woman asks if Charlie is really out of cash and Charlie tells her not to worry, that he has plenty of hooker money.

  24. Two and a Half Men S6 E1 still E1

    1. Taterhead Is Our Love Child

    In the 6th season opener, Charlie runs into an ex-girlfriend and a child who bears a striking resemblance to Charlie.

Season 7

2009 · 22 episodes · Last episode: 16 years ago

Charlie's romantic past catches up to him, Alan's financial woes deepen, and Jake's teenage years bring a new level of mischief and mayhem.

Two and a Half Men Season 7 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S7 E22 still E22

    22. This Is Not Gonna End Well

    Finale

    Charlie is miffed over Alan's planned attendance of Chelsea's birthday party and suffers the indignity of having Jake chauffer him around following a license suspension.

  2. Two and a Half Men S7 E21 still E21

    21. Gumby with a Pokey

    Charlie is visited by the ghosts of his ex-girlfriends while Alan and Jake are on a road trip.

  3. Two and a Half Men S7 E20 still E20

    20. I Called Him Magoo

    Alan tries for an intimate night at a hotel with his new girlfriend, while Charlie takes a different approach to obtain the "girlfriend experience"

  4. Two and a Half Men S7 E19 still E19

    19. Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave

    Alan is torn between the bad influence of Jake's new friend and the hotness of his mother.

  5. Two and a Half Men S7 E18 still E18

    18. Ixnay on the Oggie Day

    Charlie has a return engagement with Chelsea's best friend, while Alan has an unexpected effect on a new female patient.

  6. Two and a Half Men S7 E17 still E17

    17. I Found Your Moustache

    Charlie and Chelsea have a post-breakup one-night stand.

  7. Two and a Half Men S7 E16 still E16

    16. Tinkle Like a Princess

    Charlie runs off to Vegas and returns with a new wife, but she's not Chelsea.

  8. Two and a Half Men S7 E15 still E15

    15. Aye, Aye, Captain Douche

    Chelsea and Charlie's relationship is at risk when Charlie's jealousy comes between them.

  9. Two and a Half Men S7 E14 still E14

    14. Crude and Uncalled For

    Charlie suspects Chelsea likes the lawyer representing Alan after his arrest for a bar fight.

  10. Two and a Half Men S7 E13 still E13

    13. Yay, No Polyps!

    Charlie opts to have a colonoscopy in order to avoid going on a trip with Chelsea to see her parents. However, when he returns home, he finds her parents at his house.

  11. Two and a Half Men S7 E12 still E12

    12. Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste

    Jake hopes to win back Celeste by writing her love songs. Alan and Herb hope to keep Judith from finding out they've become friends.

  12. Two and a Half Men S7 E11 still E11

    11. Warning, It's Dirty

    Mid-season finale

    Jake is taught the art of infidelity by Charlie, while Celeste is away for Christmas.

  13. Two and a Half Men S7 E10 still E10

    10. That's Why They Call It "Ball Room"

    Chelsea wants Charlie to take dancing lessons for the wedding, when Charlie uncovers the truth that Chelsea has been lying about her finances.

  14. Two and a Half Men S7 E9 still E9

    9. Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair

    While Alan struggles to cure his baldness, Charlie deals with the problem that he can't satisfy Chelsea.

  15. Two and a Half Men S7 E8 still E8

    8. Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.

    While overcoming a bad break-up, Chelsea invites her beautiful college roommate to stay at the house.

  16. Two and a Half Men S7 E7 still E7

    7. Untainted by Filth

    Alan and Charlie are shocked when they wake up next to a strange woman, and try to find out what happened.

  17. Two and a Half Men S7 E6 still E6

    6. Give Me Your Thumb

    Alan's advice to Chelsea that she get breast-reduction surgery is not met with enthusiasm by Charlie, who kicks him out, but staying with Evelyn has its own challenges.

  18. Two and a Half Men S7 E5 still E5

    5. For the Sake of the Child

    Jake stops at nothing to get away from Charlie and Alan, after they embarrass him out in public.

  19. Two and a Half Men S7 E4 still E4

    4. Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator

    Alan starts working for Evelyn as Charlie works to fix the relationship between Chelsea and Jake.

  20. Two and a Half Men S7 E3 still E3

    3. Mmm, Fish. Yum.

    Alan ends up playing maid to Judith's new baby as well as his former mother-in-law. Meanwhile, Jake uses an incriminating photo to blackmail Charlie.

  21. Two and a Half Men S7 E2 still E2

    2. Whipped Unto the Third Generation

    When Chelsea convinces Charlie to let Alan's new girlfriend, Melissa, move in, the girls end up taking over Charlie's house.

  22. Two and a Half Men S7 E1 still E1

    1. 818-JKLPUZO

    Charlie must make a difficult decision about his future and with which woman he wants to spend his life: Chelsea or Mia.

Season 8

2010 · 16 episodes · Last episode: 15 years ago

Old patterns and new faces collide as the Harpers continue their hilarious struggle to keep life, love, and laundry under control.

Two and a Half Men Season 8 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S8 E16 still E16

    16. That Darn Priest

    Finale

    Rose and Alan discover each other's secrets. Meanwhile, Charlie's desperate to get some time alone with Rose.

  2. Two and a Half Men S8 E15 still E15

    15. Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak

    While Charlie and Rose carry on their "affair," Alan's chiropractic business turns into a Ponzi scheme.

  3. Two and a Half Men S8 E14 still E14

    14. Lookin' for Japanese Subs

    Obsessed and believing her to be married, Charlie starts stalking Rose. Jake and Eldridge start taping themselves doing Jackass-style stunts.

  4. Two and a Half Men S8 E13 still E13

    13. Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup

    Alan feels paranoid when Lyndsey becomes friendly with Charlie.

  5. Two and a Half Men S8 E12 still E12

    12. Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead

    Mid-season finale

    Depressed after his breakup from Courtney (Jenny McCarthy), Charlie goes to see his psychiatrist (Jane Lynch).

  6. Two and a Half Men S8 E11 still E11

    11. Dead from the Waist Down

    Alan goes to great lengths to be able to get Lyndsey a nice birthday present.

  7. Two and a Half Men S8 E10 still E10

    10. Ow, Ow, Don't Stop

    When Charlie's ex-girlfriend Courtney is released from prison, he treats her to the good life despite her having been in prison for conning him.

  8. Two and a Half Men S8 E9 still E9

    9. A Good Time in Central Africa

    When Berta takes a couple of days off, Charlie falls for her replacement. Meanwhile, Alan believes he's being stalked by Lyndsey's ex-husband.

  9. Two and a Half Men S8 E8 still E8

    8. Springtime on a Stick

    Charlie and Alan try to set up Evelyn with Russell the pharmacist.

  10. Two and a Half Men S8 E7 still E7

    7. The Crazy Bitch Gazette

    Charlie's girlfriend gets fed up with his stalker, Rose.

  11. Two and a Half Men S8 E6 still E6

    6. Twanging Your Magic Clanger

    Charlie has difficulty dealing with dating a slightly older woman.

  12. Two and a Half Men S8 E5 still E5

    5. The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel

    Alan pretends to be Charlie when he goes out on the town; Charlie sneaks off for cosmetic surgery.

  13. Two and a Half Men S8 E4 still E4

    4. Hookers, Hookers, Hookers

    Lyndsey and Eldridge move into Charlie's house after their home burns down.

  14. Two and a Half Men S8 E3 still E3

    3. A Pudding-Filled Cactus

    After moving in with Lyndsey, Alan continues to have a rendezvous with Melissa at Charlie's house.

  15. Two and a Half Men S8 E2 still E2

    2. A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer

    Charlie is willing to do anything for Alan to accept Lyndsey's offer to move in with her.

  16. Two and a Half Men S8 E1 still E1

    1. Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud

    When Jake finds out that Alan has been dating Eldridge's mom, he packs up and heads to Judith and Herb's. Meanwhile, Charlie decides it's time to cut back on boozing.

Season 9

2011 · 24 episodes · Last episode: 14 years ago

A new chapter begins when internet billionaire Walden Schmidt moves in, bringing fresh energy, wealth, and more absurd adventures to the Malibu household.

Two and a Half Men Season 9 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S9 E24 still E24

    24. Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

    Finale

    Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.

  2. Two and a Half Men S9 E23 still E23

    23. The Straw in My Donut Hole

    Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn't so sure it's deserved.

  3. Two and a Half Men S9 E22 still E22

    22. Why We Gave Up Women

    Charlie's ghost pays a visit to Alan after he suffers a minor heart attack.

  4. Two and a Half Men S9 E21 still E21

    21. Mr. Hose Says "Yes"

    Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargained for when he moves in with Lyndsey

  5. Two and a Half Men S9 E20 still E20

    20. Grandma's Pie

    Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Alan and Lyndsey try to cope with their mom's relationship.

  6. Two and a Half Men S9 E19 still E19

    19. Palmdale, Ech

    Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers. Jake and Eldridge get a ride from Walden to a party.

  7. Two and a Half Men S9 E18 still E18

    18. The War Against Gingivitis

    Walden's ex-business partner shows up at the beach house looking to make peace.

  8. Two and a Half Men S9 E17 still E17

    17. Not in My Mouth!

    Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has a drinking problem.

  9. Two and a Half Men S9 E16 still E16

    16. Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

    Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on Valentine's Day.

  10. Two and a Half Men S9 E15 still E15

    15. The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

    Walden tries to loosen Zooey up by sharing some of Berta's special brownies.

  11. Two and a Half Men S9 E14 still E14

    14. A Possum on Chemo

    Zoey tries to convince Walden to cut his hair and shave; Alan and Lyndsey revive their relationship.

  12. Two and a Half Men S9 E13 still E13

    13. Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

    Walden's ex-wife and mother try to take control of his company, so he turns to Alan for help.

  13. Two and a Half Men S9 E12 still E12

    12. One False Move, Zimbabwe!

    Mid-season finale

    Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him into a downward spiral.

  14. Two and a Half Men S9 E11 still E11

    11. What a Lovely Landing Strip

    Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

  15. Two and a Half Men S9 E10 still E10

    10. A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

    Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

  16. Two and a Half Men S9 E9 still E9

    9. Frodo's Headshots

    Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

  17. Two and a Half Men S9 E8 still E8

    8. Thank You for the Intercourse

    When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

  18. Two and a Half Men S9 E7 still E7

    7. Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

    Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brother left him in his will.

  19. Two and a Half Men S9 E6 still E6

    6. The Squat and Hover

    Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

  20. Two and a Half Men S9 E5 still E5

    5. A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

    Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

  21. Two and a Half Men S9 E4 still E4

    4. Nine Magic Fingers

    Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

  22. Two and a Half Men S9 E3 still E3

    3. Big Girls Don't Throw Food

    Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

  23. Two and a Half Men S9 E2 still E2

    2. People Who Love Peepholes

    Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

  24. Two and a Half Men S9 E1 still E1

    1. Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

    Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

Season 10

2012 · 23 episodes · Last episode: 13 years ago

Walden and Alan navigate friendship, fatherhood, and fleeting fame while trying (and failing) to get their personal lives together.

Two and a Half Men Season 10 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S10 E23 still E23

    23. Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped

    Finale

    Walden dates an attractive 22-year-old (Hilary Duff), but ends up being more interested in her grandmother (Marilu Henner); Jake and Alan go on a trip.

  2. Two and a Half Men S10 E22 still E22

    22. My Bodacious Vidalia

    With encouragement from Walden, Alan decides to update his look; Alan is faced with a moral dilemma when he attracts a married woman.

  3. Two and a Half Men S10 E21 still E21

    21. Another Night with Neil Diamond

    Alan has a difficult time coping when Lyndsey breaks up with him.

  4. Two and a Half Men S10 E20 still E20

    20. Bazinga! That's from a TV Show

    Walden and Alan are caught in the crossfire when Jake cheats on his girlfriend (Jaime Pressly) with her 18-year-old daughter.

  5. Two and a Half Men S10 E19 still E19

    19. Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon

    Alan and Walden end up partying too hard as they try to cheer up Herb.

  6. Two and a Half Men S10 E18 still E18

    18. The 9:04 from Pemberton

    After a fight with Walden, Alan decides to move in with Herb.

  7. Two and a Half Men S10 E17 still E17

    17. Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries

    When Walden runs into his ex and they start talking about getting back together, Alan worries that she is not good enough.

  8. Two and a Half Men S10 E16 still E16

    16. Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby

    Depressed on Valentine's Day, Walden tries to talk Kate into giving him another chance; Alan's holiday plans go south.

  9. Two and a Half Men S10 E15 still E15

    15. Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It

    When Jake brings his 36-year-old girlfriend home for a visit, Alan is concerned; Walden tries to hide something from Alan.

  10. Two and a Half Men S10 E14 still E14

    14. Run, Steven Staven! Run!

    Alan is faced with relationship trouble when he does not give Lyndsey a key to the beach house; Walden, Alan, Herb and Billy commiserate about relationships.

  11. Two and a Half Men S10 E13 still E13

    13. Grab a Feather and Get in Line

    Alan and Walden go to Kate's fashion show in New York so Walden can reveal the truth about his identity.

  12. Two and a Half Men S10 E12 still E12

    12. Welcome to Alancrest

    Alan invests Walden's money in Kate's fashion line; leading a double life takes its toll on Walden.

  13. Two and a Half Men S10 E11 still E11

    11. Give Santa a Tail-Hole

    Mid-season finale

    Walden juggles his two identities; Alan ends up alone on Christmas.

  14. Two and a Half Men S10 E10 still E10

    10. One Nut Johnson

    Alan helps Walden create a new identity so he can avoid women who are only interested in his money.

  15. Two and a Half Men S10 E9 still E9

    9. I Scream When I Pee

    Alans famous ex-wife, Kandi, wants to reconcile; when Berta isn't interested in celebrating her birthday, Walden tries to make her day special.

  16. Two and a Half Men S10 E8 still E8

    8. Something My Gynecologist Said

    Alan feels reluctant to make a commitment to Lyndsey, but an unexpected source inspires him; Walden enjoys being the boy-toy of a wealthy older woman.

  17. Two and a Half Men S10 E7 still E7

    7. Avoid the Chinese Mustard

    When Walden gets tired of the complications that come with a traditional relationship, he hires an actress to be his girlfriend; Jake plans a rendezvous with Missi (Miley Cyrus) at the beach house.

  18. Two and a Half Men S10 E6 still E6

    6. Ferrets, Attack!

    Walden must choose between Zoey and Rose.

  19. Two and a Half Men S10 E5 still E5

    5. That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam

    Despite Alan's warnings, Walden starts dating Rose.

  20. Two and a Half Men S10 E4 still E4

    4. You Do Know What the Lollipop's For

    Walden starts to feel his age when a friend's daughter comes to town.

  21. Two and a Half Men S10 E3 still E3

    3. Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt

    Alan and Lyndsey decide to spice things up in the bedroom.

  22. Two and a Half Men S10 E2 still E2

    2. A Big Bag of Dog

    Zoey and Walden break up, causing Walden to experience a breakdown.

  23. Two and a Half Men S10 E1 still E1

    1. I Changed My Mind About the Milk

    Walden plans a big surprise for Zoey's birthday.

Season 11

2013 · 22 episodes · Last episode: 12 years ago

When a young woman claiming to be Charlie's daughter arrives, life at the beach house turns upside down again in the best, most dysfunctional way.

Two and a Half Men Season 11 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S11 E22 still E22

    22. Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead

    Finale

    Alan must face the consequences after revealing his identity to Larry.

  2. Two and a Half Men S11 E21 still E21

    21. Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot

    Alan's girlfriend, Gretchen, insists he confess his true identity to Larry. Meanwhile, Walden goes on a road trip with Jenny and Barry to see his first car.

  3. Two and a Half Men S11 E20 still E20

    20. Lotta Delis in Little Armenia

    Alan finds an opportunity to make money; Walden addresses his co-dependency issues.

  4. Two and a Half Men S11 E19 still E19

    19. Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang

    After reconnecting with Kate, Walden becomes convinced she is the one for him -- until he meets a woman named Vivian.

  5. Two and a Half Men S11 E18 still E18

    18. West Side Story

    Walden gets an invitation to his ex-girlfriend's boutique opening. Meanwhile, Gretchen wants to spend more time at Alan's house.

  6. Two and a Half Men S11 E17 still E17

    17. Welcome Home, Jake

    Lyndsey finds out about Alan's relationship with Gretchen; Walden has a difficult time telling Barry to find his own place.

  7. Two and a Half Men S11 E16 still E16

    16. How to Get Rid of Alan Harper

    Walden thinks his girlfriend is cheating on him; Alan starts dating Larry's sister, Gretchen.

  8. Two and a Half Men S11 E15 still E15

    15. Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin

    Alan asks Lyndsey to choose between him and Larry; Jenny worries that she and Brooke are growing apart.

  9. Two and a Half Men S11 E14 still E14

    14. Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe

    Alan finds out that Lyndsey broke up with Larry without telling him; Walden tries to prove he is a man's man.

  10. Two and a Half Men S11 E13 still E13

    13. Bite Me, Supreme Court

    Marty Pepper proposes to Evelyn; Alan and Walden plan a bachelor party for Marty.

  11. Two and a Half Men S11 E12 still E12

    12. Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.

    Lyndsey's boyfriend sets Alan up on a date; Walden wants to help Nicole with her project so she will have time to date him.

  12. Two and a Half Men S11 E11 still E11

    11. Tazed in the Lady Nuts

    Walden joins his beautiful former employee on a brilliant new project. Meanwhile, Alan advises Jenny to open up to her girlfriend or risk losing her.

  13. Two and a Half Men S11 E10 still E10

    10. On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer!

    Mid-season finale

    Jake sends Alan a Japanese delicacy; the house comes alive with questionable Christmas lyrics.

  14. Two and a Half Men S11 E9 still E9

    9. Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer

    Walden goes on a date with an accident-prone model; Alan's date reveals surprising personal information about herself to him.

  15. Two and a Half Men S11 E8 still E8

    8. Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.

    Alan and Lyndsey's illicit affair puts Walden in danger, forcing him to accept Rose's help.

  16. Two and a Half Men S11 E7 still E7

    7. Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie

    Walden and Alan find themselves on dates with two ideal women until Lyndsey's jealousy throws a wrench in their evening.

  17. Two and a Half Men S11 E6 still E6

    6. Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants

    When Alan learns Walden knows Lynda Carter, he asks him to set him up on a date with her. Against his better judgment, Walden agrees to invite her to the house for dinner.

  18. Two and a Half Men S11 E5 still E5

    5. Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003

    Alan tries to find out what Lyndsey's boyfriend has over him; Walden helps Jenny pursue her acting career.

  19. Two and a Half Men S11 E4 still E4

    4. Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank

    Alan and Lyndsey's illicit relationship becomes jeopardized when one of Lyndsey's man-hunting friends, Stephanie (Jennifer Aspen), asks if they are back together. The two staunchly deny it, then Lyndsey insists that Alan make a date with Stephanie so that she will believe their lie. Alan meets her for an uncomfortable date, which nevertheless leads to sex, causing Lyndsey to get mad and leave Alan again.

  20. Two and a Half Men S11 E3 still E3

    3. This Unblessed Biscuit

    Walden and Alan think it may be time for Berta to retire when she injures her back at work. When they suggest her retiring, she grows offended, and as the conversation progresses she quits. Walden and Alan then try different maids, with little success.

  21. Two and a Half Men S11 E2 still E2

    2. I Think I Banged Lucille Ball

    Jenny moves in with Evelyn and her wealthy boyfriend, Marty.

  22. Two and a Half Men S11 E1 still E1

    1. Nangnangnangnang

    Charlie's 25-year-old daughter arrives at the beach house, hoping to get to know her family.

Season 12

2014 · 16 episodes · Last episode: 11 years ago

In the final season, Walden and Alan take drastic (and hilarious) steps to redefine family, love, and what it means to finally grow up.

Two and a Half Men Season 12 release dates →
  1. Two and a Half Men S12 E16 still E16

    16. Of Course He's Dead (2)

    Finale

    Charlie Harper is alive. Or is he?

  2. Two and a Half Men S12 E15 still E15

    15. Of Course He's Dead (1)

    Charlie Harper is alive. Or is he?

  3. Two and a Half Men S12 E14 still E14

    14. Don't Give a Monkey a Gun

    After they sign their divorce papers, Walden offers Alan the gift of his choice, but when Alan chooses something selfish and impractical, it puts his relationship with Lyndsey on the line.

  4. Two and a Half Men S12 E13 still E13

    13. Boompa Loved His Hookers

    Walden fears if he breaks up with Ms. McMartin, it will jeopardize his adoption of Louis. Also, Alan hesitates when Lyndsey asks him to move in with her.

  5. Two and a Half Men S12 E12 still E12

    12. A Beer-Battered Rip-Off

    When Alan breaks up with their social worker to get back together with Lyndsey, Walden worries it will affect Louis’ adoption.

  6. Two and a Half Men S12 E11 still E11

    11. For Whom the Booty Calls

    Walden joins a group for adoptive fathers, and finds it to be a nice escape from Alan.

  7. Two and a Half Men S12 E10 still E10

    10. Here I Come, Pants!

    Alan takes it upon himself to help Walden keep Louis after the social worker discovers he and Walden are not really a gay couple.

  8. Two and a Half Men S12 E9 still E9

    9. Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey

    Walden discovers how challenging it is to be intimate with women when his foster son, Louis, is in the house. Also, Herb asks Alan if he can go on a date with Lyndsey.

  9. Two and a Half Men S12 E8 still E8

    8. Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey

    Mid-season finale

    Alan and Walden attempt to convince Louis that Santa Claus is real.

  10. Two and a Half Men S12 E7 still E7

    7. Sex with an Animated Ed Asner

    Alan and Walden befriend three moms at a kids’ gym, but things get complicated when Walden becomes attracted to one of them. Alan goes out for a girls’ night with a group of moms.

  11. Two and a Half Men S12 E6 still E6

    6. Alan Shot a Little Girl

    Alan breaks Walden's rules when he realizes that Louis thinks he's cool, and he wants it to stay that way.

  12. Two and a Half Men S12 E5 still E5

    5. Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.

    Walden becomes a foster parent to a 6-year-old boy, but worries about himself when they don't hit it off like he hoped.

  13. Two and a Half Men S12 E4 still E4

    4. Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight

    A birth mother considers having Walden and Alan adopt her baby.

  14. Two and a Half Men S12 E3 still E3

    3. Glamping in a Yurt

    Alan and Walden have a meeting with an adoption social worker that hinges on them being convincing as a loving couple. Lyndsey returns after 60 days in rehab.

  15. Two and a Half Men S12 E2 still E2

    2. A Chic Bar in Ibiza

    Alan has second thoughts about getting married after he's asked to sign a pre-nup.

  16. Two and a Half Men S12 E1 still E1

    1. The Ol' Mexican Spinach

    After a health scare on Halloween, Walden decides he needs to change his life.

Cast & crew

Created by Lee Aronsohn and Chuck Lorre

  • Angus T. Jones

    Angus T. Jones

    Jake Harper

  • Conchata Ferrell

    Conchata Ferrell

    Berta

  • Holland Taylor

    Holland Taylor

    Evelyn Harper

  • Marin Hinkle

    Marin Hinkle

    Judith Melnick

  • Jennifer Bini Taylor

    Jennifer Bini Taylor

    Chelsea

  • Melanie Lynskey

    Melanie Lynskey

    Rose

  • April Bowlby

    April Bowlby

    Kandi

  • Susan Blakely

    Susan Blakely

    Angie

  • Sara Rue

    Sara Rue

    Naomi

  • Carol Kane

    Carol Kane

    Shelly

  • Kristin Richardson

    Kristin Richardson

    Tiffany

  • Michael Patrick McGill

    Michael Patrick McGill

    Officer Smith

  • Krista Allen

    Krista Allen

    Olivia Peason

  • Heather Locklear

    Heather Locklear

    Laura

  • Nicole Forester

    Nicole Forester

    Camille

  • Abigail Mavity

    Abigail Mavity

    Brianna

Two and a Half Men FAQ

Will there be new episodes of Two and a Half Men?

Two and a Half Men has ended, so no new episodes are scheduled. The final episode aired on February 19, 2015.

When did the latest episode of Two and a Half Men come out?

The most recent episode of Two and a Half Men, Season 12 Episode 16 "Of Course He's Dead (2)", aired on February 19, 2015.

How many seasons of Two and a Half Men are there?

Two and a Half Men has 12 seasons with 262 episodes in total.

When did Two and a Half Men first air?

Two and a Half Men first aired on CBS on September 22, 2003.

How do I get notified when new episodes of Two and a Half Men are released?

Download the Streambay app, follow Two and a Half Men, and you'll get a push notification the moment each new episode is released.

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